Chapter 6: Mr. Meanbanker from the bank

So here's the new new chapter.

Mr. Meanbanker from the bank arrived at Q-chan's small farm at precisely 2 PM. There was a scowl on his face, and he meant business. He stepped in exactly three cowpies on his way in. When he meant business he tended to look directly in front of him, and as a result, he tended not to notice thing on the ground.
It was about the time that Lotty returned from the bathroom that Mr. Meanbanker from the bank knocked on the door. “I'll get it!” Q-chan exclaimed in a sing-song voice. Of course, it was her house, so there really wasn't any question about which one of them would get it.
Q-chan opened the front door to reveal the menacing figure of Mr. Meanbanker. Dressed all in black, his mustache nearly curling up to the brim of his top hat, Mr. Meanbanker stood in stark contrast to the peaceful farmland around him.
“Are you the one they call Q?” He asked. His eyes seemed to pierce directly into Q-chan's very soul.
“Yeah, that's me!” Q-chan replied.
With a flutter of his long black cape, Mr. Meanbanker drew a legal document from out of his pocket and handed it to Q-chan.
“I'm Horace Meanbanker.” He said, glaring down at her with the ire he reserved for child molesters and people who defaulted on mortgage payments. “I work for the bank, and you're three payments behind.”
“Yeah,” Q-chan replied, a little embarrassed. “Business hasn't been too good lately.”
“Oh hasn't it?” Meanbanker replied, “maybe that's because you don't grow anything.” Meanbanker gestured to the land surrounding Q-chan's house. It was empty save for the various farm animals she had collected. There was no evidence of a crop, or of any sort of harvesting equipment.
“As far as I can tell, Ms. Q,” Meanbanker continued, “what you call a farm is just a loose collection of livestock, unrestrained and untended. I ran into a cow out on the lawn!”
“I noticed,” Q-chan said, smiling. She could smell the scent of manure rising from Meanbanker's shoes, that's why she hadn't invited him in.
“Nevertheless, if you miss one more payment, I will have no further option but to foreclose!” Meanbanker intoned, twirling his mustache wickedly. He turned to leave, but then turned back a second later.
“On a completely unrelated note!” He shouted at the top of his lungs. “I must compliment you on your exquisite lawn care technique! I can spy not a single dandelion, whereas my lawn is forever troubled by that meddlesome weed. Good day ma'am!” Having said his piece, Meanbanker turned around with a flourish of his cape and headed out through the yard. This time he had the presence of mind to avoid the cowpies.
“What was that about?” Lotty asked. She'd seen Mr. Meanbanker before, but never this far out of town.
“He says if I don't make my next mortgage payment he's gonna foreclose on me!” Q-chan exclaimed. This was the first time Lotty had ever heard Q-chan sound worried. Even when she had spilled the coffee earlier, there had still been a hint of joy in her voice, and a glimmer of hope for things to come.
Q-chan opened the envelope to see that it was a final notice from the bank. No surprise there, but it made Meanbanker's threats seem all the more real.
“Oh, Lotty, what am I gonna do?” She asked pathetically. “I'm starting to think that my new cow isn't lucky at all...”
“Well, I'm glad you're finally being reasonable.” Lotty replied. She felt sorry for her friend, but she couldn't help feeling vindicated in her opinions about the new cow. “After all, what use is a cow that just stands around all day eating dandelions?”
Upon hearing this, Q-chan's entire body stiffened. He eyeballs began to bulge out of her skull, as if she'd just had an idea so big it threatened to shove them out to make room for itself.
“That's it!” she exclaimed.
“What's it?” Lotty asked, keeping in mind the old adage about asking stupid questions.
“She eats dandelions! Look! She didn't just eat that one, she ate every single one that was on my lawn!” Q-chan gestured to her lawn, which was indeed entirely free from dandelions. The one they had seen the cow eat had only been the last of many.
“So what?” Lotty shrugged, “she's just a weird cow who won't eat grass.”
“But that's exactly it!” Q-chan said, frustrated at Lotty's failure to grasp her idea. “She eats dandelions, but she doesn't eat grass! She's like an all natural weed removal service!”
“She's what?” Lotty, asked, still failing to follow.
“We can take her to other people lawns, and charge them to get rid of the dandelions!” Q-chan explained. “And then we can use the money to pay Mr. Meanbanker from the bank!”
“What do you mean 'we?'” Lotty asked, understandably worried. “This isn't my farm. I just wanted to borrow salt.”
“This is perfect!” Q-chan shouted, jumping for joy. “The same time I get a final notice from the bank, a special cow shoes up to help me make some money! How lucky is that?”
“You have a very strange definition of luck, Q.” Lotty replied.
“Quick, help me hitch up the cow trailer! We're going into town right away to get started!”
“Again, you say 'we'” Lotty said, distressed. “But this is not my farm, and that's not my cow, so I don't see why you think-”
“Look!” Q-chan interrupted in an alarming, threatening tone. “You can ride up front with me, or you can ride in the trailer with the cow, but either way you're coming with me!”
Lotty gulped and then meekly went to go hook up the cow trailer. Q-chan was frightening when angered, and would have no qualms about locking her in a trailer with a smelly cow for hours on end.
And so it was that one of the greatest partnerships in professional landscaping was born. Q-chan, Lotty, and their very special cow would henceforth be known as The Dandelion Zappers. Or, at least, that was the name that Q-chan stenciled on the side of her truck. A mere hour and a half later, the trailer was hooked up, and Lotty and Q-chan were on their way into town to ply their newfound trade.
From off in the distance, the evil wizard Pretorius looked on. “Excellent!' he said aloud to no one in particular. “The flight out here drained supercow of his energy, but soon these oblivious fools will fill her full of enough dandelions to restore her full energy. And then, after I have murdered those two idiots and stolen the cow back, the awesome luck and power of the supercow will once again be mine! All mine!” He let out a laugh, and evil laugh that confused and disturbed everyone around him, for he had chosen an outdoor cafe as his place of refuge while he waited for the supercow's energy to be restored.
“Sir, you're disturbing the other patrons with your constant laughing and monologuing” a well-intentioned waiter interjected. For his trouble, the waiter was turned into a newt.
“Fool!” Pretorius intoned melodramatically, “you dare to deprive me of my right to monologue and laugh? And I ordered my coffee like half an hour ago! Where is it? Where?”
Unaware of this distant danger, Lotty and Q-chan continued into town. They had no clue that the mysterious cow in the trailer behind them was the legendary and powerful supercow of legend, and that fate had conspired to throw them into an awesome adventure, a battle of good versus evil the likes of which the world had never before seen.